Spreading Holiday Sickness

Well, it was going to happen. As all parents and teachers know, the first week of school is meant to spread disease. Little children wiping their noses on each other and any doorknob within reach. Joining in the choir of loose coughs. Enveloping the spigot in their mouths when drinking from communal fountains.

The rest of September is set aside to spread disease around the immediate family. Take out any siblings that got away from the first wave at school. Return the kindness of parental nursing by infecting Mum and Dad with congestion, sore throats and body aches.

After taking time off of work to care for sick children, parents drag their feverish souls to work and use hand sanitizer as an ineffectual apology to their healthy co-workers. Work places become minefields of wet sneezes and hacking coughs.

Any adults that avoided the child-driven wave of disease are rewarded with a slightly different strain of virus that they can bring back home and share. By now, it’s Thanksgiving and I sit beside my brother who has given me the nastiest flu ever. Awesome.

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